We’ve all been there. Or we’re going to be there very soon. A situation comes up that we know will require a really tough meeting. Or we get the dreaded email to report to the pastor’s office without any context or warning. How do you deal with difficult meetings?

Pray

If you know that a tough meeting is coming up, spend some dedicated time in prayer about it. God knows our anxieties. He cares about them. He wants us to tell him what we’re anxious about because he cares for us. I find that to be incredibly comforting. Especially if I know I’m about to walk into a difficult meeting.

Focus on facts 

With really tough meetings, there can be a lot of emotions. Anger. Sadness. Confusion. Frustration. It can be really easy to get into the moment’s emotions and forget what is going on or what the meeting is about.

Do your best to focus on the facts of the meeting and refer back to them if you feel like you get off track. 

Listen more than you talk

Whether or not you called the meeting or are the subject of the meeting, it will be really important to listen. Even though it’s important to focus on facts, listening to the emotions and recognizing them will help you ensure the other party knows you are Listening to them and that you care for them.

If you are the source of the meeting, it can be tempting to defend yourself. Do your best to ask questions that show you are listening and want to understand what is happening.

Be clear

Don’t allow yourself to think that being vague will soften the blow of any tough news. It will only add to hurt feelings if you do not communicate clearly. Be concise and be very clear about what is happening. Asked to make sure you understand and are understood.

Make a plan

At the end of the meeting, make sure you create a concrete plan for moving forward or understand the plan. Repeat it back and write it down. Make sure everyone understands what the next steps are. If you leave tough meetings without knowing what’s next, it can create confusion.

If you write it down, you can send it in an email to everyone at the meeting to ensure there’s no confusion and that everyone knows what the next proper steps are.

Pray again

Meetings like these are always really tough. Invite God into every single moment! Thank him for the chance that you get to minister when things are tough and that he cares for you when ministry is really hard.

We’re praying for you here at DYM! Thank you for all that you do.