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25 Mar 2024

Empowering Students in Evangelism: The Power of ‘Who Is Your One?’

By |2024-03-25T09:04:17-07:00March 25th, 2024|Youth Ministry Ideas|1 Comment

When it comes to evangelism, many students find the concept overwhelming. The idea of going out and telling all their friends about Jesus can seem daunting. There’s a common misconception that evangelism requires boldness, public speaking, or street preaching. However, there’s a simpler and more effective approach that breaks down this big idea into something more manageable and realistic: “Who Is Your One?”

“What is ‘Who Is Your One’?”

“Who Is Your One” is an initiative we have been doing in our ministry that encourages students to be intentional about reaching out to a friend they already have who doesn’t know Jesus. It’s about nurturing existing relationships, being there for them, praying for them, inviting them to church, and engaging in conversations about faith. The goal is for students to demonstrate their own relationship with Jesus through their friendship, ultimately leading their friend to a deeper understanding of faith.

This approach to evangelism is rooted in Jesus’ own interactions with people. He often spent time with individuals, inviting himself into their lives and showing them love and acceptance, regardless of their background or beliefs. It’s a relational approach that students can relate to and implement in their own lives.

Why “Who Is Your One” Matters:

In our ministry, “Who Is Your One” has been instrumental in driving growth and impact over the last two years. By encouraging students to focus on just one person, we’ve seen a significant increase in effectiveness and engagement.

How We Implemented “Who Is Your One”:

  • Vision Series: At the beginning of the school year, we introduced the concept of “Who Is Your One” through a dedicated vision series. This series laid the foundation for why this initiative is important and challenged our students to take action.
  • Business Cards: We created business cards with the prompt “My one is ________,” allowing students to fill in the name of their chosen person. These cards served as a daily reminder and were also shared with small group leaders for accountability.
  • Leader Training: We provided training for our leaders at the start of the school year to equip them with the tools and understanding to support their students in reaching their “one.”
  • Curriculum Integration: We integrated “Who Is Your One” updates into our curriculum, ensuring that the topic was regularly addressed in small group discussions.
  • Storytelling: We shared stories of success from our campuses, highlighting instances where someone’s “one” had come to church and started a relationship with Jesus. These stories served as inspiration and motivation for students.
  • Celebration: We celebrated students and leaders who embraced the “Who Is Your One” initiative, both privately and publicly. Recognizing their efforts encouraged others to follow suit.
  • Service Integration: We made sure to incorporate “Who Is Your One” into every service, reinforcing its importance and keeping it at the forefront of our ministry culture.

The Impact of “Who Is Your One”:

By empowering students to own and embrace the concept of “Who Is Your One,” we’ve witnessed a transformation in how we approach evangelism. Students are better equipped and motivated to reach out to their friends, knowing that they have the support and encouragement of their community.

The beauty of “Who Is Your One” lies in its simplicity and accessibility. It doesn’t require fancy events or elaborate strategies. It’s about genuine friendship and creating a safe space where students feel comfortable inviting their friends to explore faith together.

“Who Is Your One” is not just a program; it’s a mindset shift that empowers students to be ambassadors of Jesus in their own circles. By focusing on one person at a time, students can make a meaningful impact and share the love of Christ in a tangible and relatable way. Let’s continue to nurture this culture of evangelism and support students as they embark on this journey of faith and friendship.

– Justin

Need help with a resource from DYM? We got you!

Want to get your students moving? Our faith is meant to be one of action. Get your students to understand these 3 key teachings from the life of Christ, all including the challenge to “GO”:

20 Nov 2023

What to do when no one shows up for youth group?

By |2023-11-20T11:54:40-08:00November 20th, 2023|Leadership|5 Comments


I remember quite vividly the night it happened. We had planned for Youth Ministry to proceed as usual that Sunday evening. Even though it was a holiday and we expected our numbers to be low, we did our best to ensure there would be something for our students to do.

But nobody showed up.

It can definitely feel like the most defeating thing to experience in a new ministry. You make plans all week long, prepare a lesson, organize games, buy snacks, but what do you do when no students show up?

Check Your Communication: Did everyone know there was supposed to be a youth group? Did you ensure that both parents and students were informed? If there are any official communication channels in your church, such as the website or the bulletin, did all that information go out? We should communicate a lot. I know the most frustrated I’ve ever been as a parent is receiving a half sheet of paper from the school about an event in three days that I had no prior knowledge of.

Let’s be better about that in our communication!

Look at Church Patterns Outside of Youth Group: In my church, there are men’s and women’s Bible studies that meet at the same time as our youth group. We all coordinate when we are going to meet and when we are going to take a break. Every year on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, we don’t have any midweek Bible study. The main reason for this is because so many people weren’t coming. It was almost a wasteland at church. So instead of making a lot of people feel guilty about not coming to Wednesday night Bible study, we decided it would be better as a church if we didn’t meet.

If you don’t have any students showing up, is it because there are also no adults or kids who would naturally be coming during this time as well?

Pray: Either spend some time praying right then and there with your volunteers or try to get a few parents together to pray for your students sometime in the near future. It’s also a good moment to check your own heart and pray, asking God to show you what you need to learn from this.

Meet with Your Leadership: Definitely not a fun meeting to request, but it’s better to be proactive about letting your leadership or senior pastor know that you didn’t have any students show up. Maybe they know something going on that you aren’t aware of. Maybe they can offer you some tips or ideas. They might even be able to recommend whom to meet with to figure out what to do next. Be open during this meeting. It probably won’t be enjoyable, but it might be a productive time where you try to solve some real problems.

Watch for Opportunities: He walked in about 10 minutes late. The other adult volunteer who had shown up that night and I looked at each other and shrugged. He was new, but he was there. So we went on with the lesson and had youth group. Josh accepted Christ that night. He became a leader in our youth group, led worship, and became someone I could depend on for the next several years.

Sometimes God throws you a curveball. He takes what you thought might be a loss and turns it into a God story. Be faithful. Keep reaching out to students. Watch for what God is doing. You’ve got this. More importantly, God’s got you.

6 Nov 2023

Creative Ideas for Indoor Youth Ministry

By |2023-11-06T06:58:45-08:00November 6th, 2023|Youth Ministry Ideas|6 Comments

As it gets colder outside, you probably are going to start thinking that doing indoor events is the way to go. You’ve had your fun fall festival and annual bonfire, but now it’s just too cold to be outside! Or maybe it’s been snowing in your state for the last two months. I don’t know how snow works; I live in Texas. If you do find yourself retreating indoors because your students complain about the cold, here are some tips on how to have some great indoor events!

Learn to be creative with your space

If you were lucky enough to have a youth room, think of some ways that you can spice up your space for an event. Maybe you can move the orientation of the room. Perhaps you could put a projector on a different wall than normal. You might even ask a couple of adults to come in and decorate the place for you. Whenever you do an event that’s outside your normal programming, it could be a chance to make your space feel really different. Go for it!

Take what you do before youth group and AMP IT UP

Do your students like playing video games before you get started? Do they go play nine square in your church gym? If you’re looking for an idea of an event to host, maybe you could take one of those things that you normally do and really amp it up to make it a big deal. My students were constantly asking to have a Smash Brothers tournament. What a great event to really buy into what students were excited about. Or maybe you could play volleyball if you’re one of those lucky youth pastors who have a gym to meet in. You can think of a whole bunch of different ways to make volleyball crazy and exciting. Use a giant 6-foot-wide beach ball. Make it teams of 20. You’ve got a lot of options!

Meet in a different spot in your building

If the event you’re trying to do can take place in a different space in your building, why not take advantage of that? Instead of meeting in the youth room, consider meeting in the fellowship hall or the gym. Giving your students a chance to switch things up might put them in a different mindset and allow them to think about whatever it is you’re trying to do with your event. Familiarity can be good, but putting students in a different space can also open them up to thinking differently!

Be a good steward of your building; clean up afterwards!

Last, but not least, if you’re meeting inside at your church, be considerate to the people who have to come behind you and clean it up, or to the people whose room you’re borrowing for the evening. Make sure you plan to have people help you clean after the event. I always struggled with that and thought that I would just clean it all up myself. Don’t do this! Ask people specifically to help you clean up so that you don’t come in the next day to a trashed youth room or an angry email from the cleaning crew.

Do you have any other ideas? I’d love to hear them! Comment down below or reach out. You’ve got this!

Also, if you’re looking for a few ideas for indoor events, check out the resources below.

Get your students thinking with this fun interactive game!

All students need for this one is their phone and the instructions on the screen. Super fun!

7 Aug 2023

Starting the Fall Off Right!

By |2023-08-07T08:55:53-07:00August 7th, 2023|Youth Ministry Ideas|3 Comments

Fall is finally upon us, and if you’re anything like me, you’re buzzing with excitement for what this new season holds for your student ministry. There’s something inherently invigorating about the start of the school year – new faces, fresh enthusiasm, and endless opportunities for growth in faith. So, how do we harness this energy and create an unforgettable fall kick-off for our students? Let’s dive into some tips to help you make the most of this exciting time!

Seize the Moment: Plan a Memorable Kick-Off

The start of the school year is a golden opportunity to create a memorable kick-off event. Whether you’re dedicating an entire evening or even an entire month to the kick-off, make it a big deal! Organize engaging activities, games, and maybe even a theme that resonates with your students. This sets the tone for the rest of the season and builds anticipation.

Set the Course: Reset Goals and Cast Vision

As you welcome both new and returning students, take the time to reset your goals and cast a clear vision for the year ahead. Ensure that everyone in your student ministry knows the ‘why’ behind what you’re striving for. This could involve sharing your ministry’s purpose, goals, and values during the kick-off event. A strong sense of purpose can fuel enthusiasm and commitment among your students.

Facilitate Connections: Highlight Opportunities to Engage

Fall is all about restarting and building new routines, so emphasize the various opportunities for students to connect and get involved. During the kick-off, make it crystal clear how they can plug into small groups, service projects, worship teams, and any other activities your ministry offers. Provide sign-up sheets or online forms to streamline the process and ensure everyone can find their place in the community.

Capture the Magic: Document the Kick-Off

In the whirlwind of events, it’s easy to forget to capture the special moments. Make an effort to document your fall kick-off with plenty of photos and even videos. Not only do these mementos serve as heartwarming reminders for the students, but they can also be wonderful to look back on as they move up or graduate in the future. Plus, sharing these memories on social media can help build a buzz for your ministry and attract even more students.

Nurture Lasting Relationships

Remember, a successful fall kick-off isn’t just about the event itself; it’s about building lasting relationships. Encourage your leadership team to be intentional about forming connections with both new and returning students. Whether it’s through one-on-one conversations, mentoring programs, or casual hangouts, creating a welcoming and inclusive atmosphere can help students feel valued and supported.

So there you have it, fellow youth pastors – a roadmap to creating an amazing fall kick-off for your student ministry! This is a season of renewed energy and eager hearts, and by implementing these strategies, you can set the stage for a year full of growth, community, and spiritual development.

Remember, each student who walks through your doors is on a unique journey, and your role is to guide, encourage, and inspire them as they navigate their faith. Have an incredible fall kick-off, and may this season be one of transformation and abundant blessings for both you and your students.

Need a game to kickstart your fall?

Get your group up and active in this classic game that will have students grouping up and performing festive actions.

Have your students up and milling around. You will show a number and a school-themed action on the screen. Participants then need to get in groups (aka “clumps”) that match the number and perform the action displayed. If you play it as an elimination game, the last group to form, or without enough people to form the group, is out.

Click here to download and play!

20 Mar 2023

Students Need to Serve

By |2023-03-17T11:36:28-07:00March 20th, 2023|Leadership|2 Comments

We know student ministry is a big deal. It’s an important aspect of the church. It provides a platform for students to grow spiritually, develop positive relationships, and establish a sense of belonging. But we can supercharge this in a big way! To enhance the effectiveness of youth ministry, have students serve within the group. Serving enables students to take ownership of their faith, discover their talents, develop humility, and disciple others.

Serving creates ownership. When students are involved in serving within the youth group, they feel a sense of responsibility and belonging. They are more likely to take ownership of their faith and develop a deeper commitment to the ministry. This sense of ownership not only helps the youth ministry to flourish, but it also nurtures a greater sense of community and togetherness.

Serving lets students explore the gifting God has given them. Every individual has unique gifts and talents, and serving provides an opportunity for students to identify and utilize their gifts in a meaningful way. By serving, they are able to experience different areas of ministry and discover where their passions and strengths lie. This process of discovery can be a powerful motivator for students to pursue their interests and continue serving in the future.

Serving helps teach humility. When students serve within the youth group, they are exposed to a variety of tasks and responsibilities. These may include cleaning up after events, setting up equipment, or assisting with activities. Regardless of the task, serving helps students learn the value of humility and the importance of putting others first. It is through these acts of service that students are able to develop a servant’s heart and a willingness to serve in whatever capacity is needed.

Serving allows students to disciple others. One of the key aspects of youth ministry is discipleship, where young people are mentored and encouraged to grow in their faith. By serving within the youth group, students have the opportunity to disciple others in a practical way. They can lead small groups, mentor younger students, and share their personal testimonies. These experiences not only strengthen the faith of those they are discipling, but they also deepen their own faith and understanding of God’s love.

Serving lets students worship. Do you have a musical portion of your service? Let students lead in getting it off the ground. There’s something really special about watching students lead their peers in worship. Also, it allows them to connect to God in a special way that they may not otherwise. God has given your students musical talents and abilities. Show them a way to put those skills to use as a form of worship! Not just in song, but with a song is a pretty cool way to serve as well.

Having students serve within the youth group can have a significant impact on both the youth ministry and the students themselves. Serving creates ownership, allows for the exploration of gifting, teaches humility, and allows for discipleship. By providing opportunities for students to serve, youth ministries can encourage the development of responsible, committed, and passionate youth who are eager to make a difference in their communities.

Ronald

Student Leadership Team Application

We use this is the application to begin a conversation with students interested in joining our Student Leadership Team. The application (and other forms) are fully editable to suit your ministry’s needs and includes sections on qualifications, expectations, and references.

Sermon on the Mount Prayer Stations

This is an interactive prayer station experience on what Jesus has to say about being a leader for the Kingdom of God. It takes the students through Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount from the perspective of leadership through 12 different stations. This resource includes complete instructions for each station in WORD and PDF, a list of all the supplies you will need, other needed resources for the stations.

6 Mar 2023

Spring is tough, but so are you!

By |2023-03-06T13:40:14-08:00March 6th, 2023|Leadership|13 Comments

As a youth pastor, I’ve learned that every season has its own challenges, but there’s something about spring that can be especially tough. For starters, spring tends to be a very busy time of year for students, with end-of-year exams, sports, and other extracurricular activities all competing for their attention. And on top of that, the weather is finally starting to warm up, which means many students are itching to spend more time outside and less time cooped up indoors.

All of these factors can make it difficult to maintain consistent attendance at youth group meetings, which can be discouraging for both the youth pastor and the students who do show up. However, I’ve also learned that with God’s grace, it’s possible to minister well even in a hard season like spring. Here are a few things that have helped me stay focused and effective during this time of year:

Prioritize relationships: When students are busy and distracted, it’s more important than ever to prioritize building relationships with them. Take the time to check in on how they’re doing, ask about their lives outside of youth group, and show a genuine interest in who they are as individuals. When they feel seen and valued, they’re more likely to stay connected to the group and to the church as a whole.

Keep things fresh: Spring can be a great time to mix things up in youth group and try new activities or events. Consider planning an outdoor scavenger hunt or a service project that allows students to get outside and enjoy the warmer weather while still connecting with each other and serving the community. You could also try incorporating more interactive elements into your lessons or discussions to keep students engaged and interested.

Be flexible: It’s important to remember that not every student will be able to make it to every meeting, and that’s okay. Rather than getting discouraged by low attendance, try to be flexible and adaptable in your programming. Consider offering different meeting times or formats that might be more convenient for students with busy schedules, and don’t be afraid to adjust your plans if something isn’t working.

Lean on prayer: Ultimately, our ability to minister well in any season comes from God’s grace and strength, not our own abilities. Make sure to spend time in prayer both individually and as a group, asking for wisdom, guidance, and perseverance. Trust that God is at work in the lives of your students even when you can’t see it, and rely on his power to sustain you through the challenges of ministry.

While spring can be a challenging season for youth ministry, it’s also a season of growth and renewal. By leaning on God’s grace and wisdom, and by staying focused on building relationships and serving our students, we can minister well even in the midst of busy schedules and distractions. May we always remember that our ministry is ultimately about pointing students towards Jesus, and may we trust in his power to bring about lasting transformation in their lives.

Ronald

13 Feb 2023

4 Tips for Encouraging your Parents

By |2023-02-13T10:06:50-08:00February 13th, 2023|Parents, Youth Ministry Hacks|4 Comments

I need to share a big mistake I’ve made as a youth pastor. I’ve been in ministry now for 19 years, 17 of which have been fully dedicated to student ministry and raising up the next generation of Christ followers and leaders. Over that time, I’ve led almost 1000 youth services, 28 retreats, and seen hundreds of teens making recorded decisions to follow Jesus and be baptized. It’s been a fun ride full of ups and downs. However, I would say for the first half of my career, I made a huge mistake that I want to share for you to learn from. If I had identified this mistake sooner, I’m confident I would have seen more fruit in the ministries I was leading and better longevity for students after they left high school. Are you ready? The mistake I made was not being intentional with the parents under my care.

Now, I know some of you might be thinking, “Big deal Theo – we are a youth ministry, not a family ministry. It’s okay! I’m sure you did great during your first half.” But hear me out… Youth ministry IS a family ministry whether we like it or not. We have these students for 1-3 hours a week. Parents have the students significantly longer than that. In fact, it took me about half of my ministry career to realize that a parent’s influence will remain in a student’s life long after my time with their student is done. So, I began a shift to connect and encourage the parents within my ministry. As a result, I saw more engaged families within our ministry. I saw better collaboration between our small group leaders and families. And yes, I even saw some families skipping certain sports activities so their students could attend Mid-Week youth group or our weekend retreats/camps. The following ideas are some tips and tricks for how you can encourage your parents:

Don’t be afraid of parents.

When I first started in ministry at the age of 18, I was terrified of parents. Yes, I was in college learning about youth ministry, but I was barely out of high school. I didn’t know how to talk to adults. I thought if parents had a conversation with me, they would realize I was flying by the seat of my pants and never bring their kids back! What I didn’t realize at the time was that most parents of middle or high school students knew they needed a village to help raise their teens. So, they were actively looking for anyone to partner with. In my later years of youth ministry, instead of hiding from parents deep within the facility, I started standing by the front door to greet parents as they picked up their few and chatted with them. Parents are nothing to be afraid of. In fact, they are eager to talk with anyone who cares about their students.

Find low-effort ways to encourage parents.

This could be a monthly e-mail. A bi-weekly social media post. A newsletter you had out at the beginning of the quarter. The goal of this particular connection point ISN’T to tell them about upcoming events. It isn’t to tell them about the mission trip fundraiser or the camp deadline that just passed. It’s just to connect and encourage your parents. Acknowledge the difficulties of raising teenagers in our current culture. Acknowledge the difficulties of parenting students in the age of Tik Tok and Google searches. Acknowledge that they are currently parenting during one of the most difficult times in human history to parent teens. Then tell them it’s okay that they are tired, that they don’t have all the answers, and that they feel overwhelmed. Let them know you see them. Equip them with an article or two that can help them understand the culture their students are in better. Then encourage them with one action they can do to spiritually influence their teens. I opted for a quarterly newsletter which we mailed out and physically handed out to students to give to parents. Getting physical communication is so rare these days. I felt like it stands out when you do get something.

Create Yearly rhythms for your whole ministry to encourage parents.

In my ministry, we started a 6th and 9th-grade parent event after church (two different days.) We went to the local pizza/arcade (think Dave and Busters or Main Event, but a little more run down cause we’re on a budget!) and treated students and parents to pizza and games. After the food, we dismissed the teens to go have fun and me and my leaders spent some time vision casting to these parents who were nervous about their student entering the next phase of life. We always did this in early summer, so we weren’t competing with school activities. It was also a GREAT way of plating our ministry flag in the family at the beginning of this new phase of life before school activities had a chance to fill up the space.

Another thing we did was just have a parent night in the fall. If you’ve never run a parent night before, check out this resource I created for youth ministries on COLEADER. If you are interested, it has everything you need to pull off a great parent night that will feel fruitful and fun, and help kick-start parent engagement.

Train your team to be specific.

Don’t be a superhero. You likely have a team of other people with you who love students. Don’t take the weight of trying to encourage every parent. Instead, train your team to look for specific things in the students they oversee and then pass that encouragement on to a parent. Raising teenagers is one of the hardest jobs in the world, and most parents are just trying their hardest to work a full-time job, care for their own mental health, and raise kids. From experience, I would say most parents don’t feel like they aren’t doing enough or don’t even know where to start. So when they get positive feedback that their mini-human did something selfless, it’s the best news a parent can get!

Make it your mission to deliver this good news to parents as often as you can. If a leader notices a student do something positive worth sharing with a parent, help that leader connect with the parent. Find them after youth group. Search for their contact information on the church database and send them a letter, e-mail, or text (who calls anymore?). Getting specific positive feedback about a student can sustain a parent during the times they feel like they’re drowning in the uncharted sea of raising teenagers.

Theo Davis serves as the Multi-Site Youth Pastor at Restore Community Church in Kansas City, Missouri.  He has worked in youth ministry for 16 years in a variety of settings which include church plants, rural churches, and mega-churches on the East Coast and now Midwest. He received his degree in Youth Ministry from Eastern University in 2008 and has continued to leverage his education with real-world experience. He and his wife Malia are huge gamers and named their kids after video game characters — Zelda & Shepherd (from The Legend of Zelda and the Mass Effect Series).  Theo also loves action figures, and spends his spare time developing his musical and visual art talents.  Follow him on Instagram @theo_davis

Need some resources to help encourage your parents? Check out these winners from DYM!

You probably didn’t go into youth ministry to focus on parents. In fact, sometimes we look at them as a hurdle to what we are trying to accomplish. Yet, there is no escaping the fact that they are an integral part of what we do and how we do it. Sometimes the best way to minister to your teens is by ministering to their parents. Allow these texts to serve as encouragement and coaching to them. Many of these are seasonal: first week of school, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Mothers’ Day, etc… Like a great DYM-product… it’s done for you. This is a great deal!

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Reflections for Parents is a prayer station experience designed specifically for parents. If you are looking for a way to connect with parents and earn their trust, provide a meaningful development opportunity, or an encouraging night out, this resource is for you.

Click here to check out this product!

19 Jan 2023

4 Tips to Create Event Hype!

By |2023-01-19T06:41:10-08:00January 19th, 2023|Uncategorized|7 Comments

We all know how hard it can be to get our students excited for upcoming events like retreats and dance parties and whatever else you might have on your calendar for the year. Whether it’s because there are a hundred other things on their calendar or they haven’t checked their email, social media, bulletin, or the youth room announcement board, students can sometimes lack the hype we’d love for them to have.

Here are a few tips to help get your students motivated and participating!

1. Get them involved in the planning process. Encourage your students to come up with ideas for the event. Have them help plan activities, pick a theme, and design promotional materials. To get them involved in the planning process, you could start by having a brainstorming session with your students. Let them come up with ideas for activities, themes, and promotional materials. You could also have a voting session where they can vote on the ideas they like best.

2. Create a “Countdown to the Event”. Have your students track the days leading up to the event and post photos or videos on social media. You could create a countdown calendar for your students to follow. You could also have them post pictures or videos on social media of them getting ready for the event with the hashtag #countdown2event.

3. Have fun and be creative with promoting the event. Have your students create fun videos or memes to share on social media and with their friends. To get your students excited about creating promotional materials, you could offer a prize for the best video or meme. You could also have them post the promotional materials on their own social media accounts to reach more people.

4. Share stories. Have your students share stories of past events and the experiences they had. Hearing stories of past events will help get your students excited for the upcoming event and give them something to look forward to. You can also ask your students to think of ways they can make the upcoming event even better than the last one.

We hope these tips help you get your students excited and ready to participate in your upcoming event. We can’t wait to hear how it goes!

Need to generate some hype right before an event? Check out this Dancing Beast Countdown from Matthew McNutt!


It’s a hairy beast dancing for five minutes to fun music. What more could you want in a countdown video?

Gold member’s got this for free this month! Want to check out what all you could get by going Gold? Click here to see all the great member perks INCLUDING some sweet new Co-Leader credits!

17 Jan 2023

3 Things Every Pastor Should Learn from MLK

By |2023-01-19T09:01:21-08:00January 17th, 2023|Uncategorized|4 Comments

It’s that time of year when everyone floods their feeds with recycled black and white photos of Martin Luther King Jr and includes one of the many one-liner quotes in their caption. Things like, “I have a dream,” or “That we will be judged, not by the color of our skin, but the content of our character” Or “Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that.” The list goes on. Now, these aren’t bad things. However, I fear in our quick recycling of social media posts to appear relevant, we are actually missing out on much deeper truths from his life. By not pausing and examining this figure, who was assassinated for his relentless pursuit of justice and reconciliation, we miss out on how his life can continue to impact us today beyond a holiday sale. While there are hundreds of lessons we could learn from this black pastor’s life, here are just three which apply to those of us who are in ministry.

He never dehumanized others.
We live in a new age of storytelling. If a news story gets popular or your post goes viral, it’s likely there is a hero or villain. The algorithms currently favor controversy and people favor drama. We all tend to view things very black and white. So, if we are the good guys, there must be villains. This is dangerous because villains can be demonized and dehumanized. However, we are interacting with other humans, other souls, other image-of-God bearers. So, when we dehumanize others to win an argument, we are actually losing.

Dr. King lived during a time when the evils of overt racism were normal, popular, and legal. “Jim Crow” laws across the United States legalized segregation under a “separate but equal” mindset. However, the accommodations for whites over their black counterparts were anything but equal. Black citizens were treated as second class and were often dehumanized at the hands of our white siblings thanks to culture and laws on the books. Dr. King reluctantly but firmly pushed against this in the name of Jesus. And he never demonized his white brothers and sisters in the process. Dr. King carried himself with honor and respect. He was sharp but slow to anger. He made cuttingly truthful observations but not in a “clap back” sense. Interview after interview, letter after letter, we see Dr. King appealing to reason and scripture. Not personally attacking those he disagreed with.

Friends, let’s follow Dr. King’s example and not the example that so many politicians these days make. While I respect leaders on both sides of the political aisle, too often their example is one that is purely appealing to their base. Let’s not be Christians who are so focused on winning an argument that we dehumanize and steamroll the very people Jesus has called us to reach. The broken, the lost, the sick, the poor, the children (teenagers), the widow, the immigrant, the prisoner, and the most overlooked parts of society.

Seeking common ground.
Dr. King sought out common ground. He toured the country having conversations with politicians, governors, and Presidents. He sat down and had conversations with white people who disagreed with him on national television. Through it all, not only did he not demonize, he used reason, wisdom, and at times scripture, to help different perspectives find common ground.

Fellow youth workers, we live during a time where there is no shortage of controversial topics or perspectives each of us could have. Some of us are Republicans, and some are democrats. Some of us support a traditional view of sexual relationships and some support an LGBTQ view. Some of us love the MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe) while others love the DCEU (Detective Comics Extended Universe). Some of us support traditional views of gender while others of us support a more fluid view. Some of us are iPhone users while others are Android users. Now, I bet most of us had powerful internal reactions to one or more topics I just mentioned. But here is the question I want you to ask yourself: when was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone with an opposing view? When was the last time you intentionally sought out common ground with that parent who is always criticizing you?

It is very easy for us to plant our flags in the ground and declare our stance and run over anyone who disagrees with us. But Dr. King didn’t change America by touring exclusively black churches and never talking to white people. He didn’t build a massive coalition consisting of black and white people by demonizing every white person in America. He did it through conversation and love. He did it through seeing each individual as an image bearer. He did it by finding common ground.

Controversial in his time, respected hero in ours.

Today it is easy to say we love Dr. King, and he is a hero. It’s easy to post a picture of him on social media on his day. It’s easy to think that if we had lived during his time, we would have been marching the streets of Selma right along with him. But let’s not forget he had enemies on both sides. He was hated by many. He was spied on by our government. There were some white people who thought he was rushing change too quickly and needed to slow down. There were some black people who thought his approach of non-violence wasn’t enacting change quickly enough and wanted to take the movement in a different direction. Ultimately, he was so controversial that an assassin’s bullet found its mark, ending Dr. King’s life. He knew the threats, he knew the dangers, he knew the risks in so many relationships. Yet he pressed on.

Fellow Christians, his work isn’t done. Our nation continues to pull off the Band-Aids of our racist past and discover that decisions made 50-100-400 years ago continue to affect all of us today. As a black pastor in Kansas City, Missouri, I see firsthand that the work isn’t done yet. When we hear someone complain of injustice, we must investigate. When we see an injustice, we must speak up. When we are complicit in injustice, we must reckon with whatever role we play and walk with those who are hurting, no matter how our friends may perceive our actions. Our students take notice of what we say and do, yes. They also take notice of what we don’t say and what we don’t do. Let’s give them an example to follow. We won’t always get it right, but thank God for His grace.

Theo Davis serves as the Multi-Site Youth Pastor at Restore Community Church in Kansas City, Missouri.  He has worked in youth ministry for 16 years in a variety of settings which include church plants, rural churches, and mega-churches on the East Coast and now Midwest. He received his degree in Youth Ministry from Eastern University in 2008 and has continued to leverage his education with real-world experience. He and his wife Malia are huge gamers and named their kids after video game characters — Zelda & Shepherd (from The Legend of Zelda and the Mass Effect Series).  Theo also loves action figures, and spends his spare time developing his musical and visual art talents.  Follow him on Instagram @theo_davis

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