This made me laugh today. Here’s a clip:

Youth pastor Josh Dyson, an advocate of contemplative spirituality, was disappointed with his church’s decision to maintain their current seeker-sensitive style. Argued Dyson, “Look, I’m all for manipulating the congregation’s emotions with a professional worship program, but if I hear another half-hour power praise medley with Barry Manilow crescendos, I’m going to stab pencils in my ears. I need some quiet time right now, dude.

When asked about the elders’ concern that contemplative spirituality smacks of Eastern mysticism, Dyson bristled at the charge. “Leave it to some old schoolers to demand biblical support before bringing cool ideas into the church. I mean, why should Buddhists enjoy all the bangin’ paths to divinity?” Dyson readily admits to practicing a mantra-like, one-word prayer to empty his mind as part of his morning ritual, followed by Cap’n Crunch and a Red Bull chaser. “It releases my consciousness from earthly restraints and brings me closer to my Source,” he revealed. “In fact, I’m still in an altered state of consciousness right now… no, wait. I think I just lost a contact lens. Never mind.”

Pastor Wiggins understands his youth pastor’s appreciation for contemplative spirituality, but he doesn’t believe this practice is part of God’s dream for New Day Family Church right now. “If the Lord wanted our church to be involved with contemplative spirituality He wouldn’t have given us a rockin’ praise band and a quarter million dollar sound system that can blow the cushions off our theater seating,” Wiggins said. “There’s plenty of time for us to ‘enter the silence’ when the congregation begins to suffer more significant hearing loss.”