Alanna has some great thoughts on purity this weekend, I would typically just link to my friends’ posts during the weekly roundup, but this one feels bigger than that. With over 10 years in the trenches in youth ministry, the subject she is writing about always comes up – as youth workers we’re good at talking to students about physical purity, but we rarely talk about the emotional attachment and the incredible loss after a breakup. She’s got some great thoughts on the subject you should check out and/or plagarize during your next series or retreat. Here’s a clip:
Growing up in church, I’ve heard about purtiy…a lot. About every year or so we go through at least one sex series and talk about “how far is too far” and how to have a “pure” relationship. All these things are very important, and extremely relevant to people’s lives. However, I strongly feel that we overlook a HUGE part of purity that I feel is just as important as physical purity…and that is emotional purity. I see it all the time…two people start dating…they’ve grown up in church…they’ve had purity engrained into their minds…they know how far they’re supposed to go. They wait and wait and wait to kiss…again…all good things. But…instead of making out…they spend their time talking for hours and sharing all about their hurts and struggles, family problems, past relationships…they become best friends…learn to trust each other, they express their love for each other, spend all their time together, they know each other inside and out…they get close with each others family, and soon learn to depend on each other as a support and refuge for lifes struggles…and then…it ends.
Now, they not only have to deal with the loss of a boyfriend…but also the loss of a best friend…a family, a support, counselor, etc. They may not have given themselves away physically…but emotionally…they’ve given everything. They are left broken and confused…”I thought it would last forever”. This is because they never knew what emotional purity was all about.