Insecurity is the debilitating lack of confidence that springs from too much self-loathing and fear of rejection.
The following isn’t necessarily biblical or even scientific, simply observational:
- everyone struggles with insecurity in significant ways
- some people struggle with insecurity quite a bit more than most
- a few of those who struggle greatly with insecurity seem to have personalities that predisposition them for insecurity
- most of those who struggle greatly with insecurity grew up in abnormally UNhealthy families
What’s the point of these observations? To create greater compassion for those who struggle greatly insecurity–a compassion of which I most definitely need.
Speaking biblically, insecurity is spiritual immaturity and presents opportunities for growth into greater likeness of Christ. Insecurity has deep roots into our basic assumptions and core identity. Because of this, they will never simply go away. They must be painfully rooted out, time and time again.
Our value is defined by God: he created us, loves us, sacrificed for us, saved us, sanctifies us, and empowers us to do great and significant things for his Kingdom. We are valuable.
As for rejection from others: free will is a fact of nature, a gift from God. We cannot take it away from others and make them accept us. Additionally: approval from others is fickle at best and destructive at worse. We are accepted.
Insecurity springs from at least two twisted realities.
A significant amount of “self-loathing” is necessary for biblical humility and surrender. We need to acknowledge our imperfections and sin and inability to save ourselves. Call it total depravity or original sin, we must be able to say, “not me, but You, God.”
Acceptance from others is a good thing, for we were made for community and relationships. We are better together.
HOWEVER, when we fail to accept the free gift of grace and shut down our pursuit of Jesus, insecurity quickly swells and prevails.